Saturday, March 20, 2010

Drivin And Cryin

What can I do you out of today? Well, my cash most likely. But how about you do me out of that pesky nicotine habit I've been carting around. Or some of that crap I've got piled up in my barn. How about doin me out of that today?
On that long list of things I wish I were better at is being a wrench. I'd settle for being even a half-assed wrench. Sure I suck my gut in and thump my chest a little and strut around some after changing a tire or jump start a car. Sometimes during that 30 point oil change I'll sneek in a "While you're at it, could you maybe throw those wipers on there?" or "Could you check that right headlight? It's acting kinda funny."

I never saw my Dad elbow's out, tinkering under the hood while growing up. Except for maybe filling the wiper fluid thing. So of course I followed suit.

Was I too cool for auto shop in high school? My gearhead friends were'nt too cool for it.
These were the same guys who, usually in November, sold enough pot to afford a winter beater or drift-bucker as Rob Ter Veer called it. Which was really just a $300 dollar piece of dung that they only had to keep alive for 5 months so they could park their $1500 dollar piece of dung for the winter.

Now, if I think I may have a battery that needs a charge, I can count on buying a new one.
You take it in on the auto parts store tester and you're garaunteed a "She's deader than a doornail, hell, I could a told you that just by lookin at it!"

Yesterday I took a tire into a shop and the kid lathers up the sidewalls with something and gave it what he must have thought was a substantial going over. "Looks fine to me. They loose a pound or 2 every couple a weeks anyway so just keep an eye on it. And if you've got some errands to run for 20 or 30 minutes, I'll give it one more look after I'm done with this other car."

Wow. Nice! How often do you take your car in for anything without taking a loan out to pay for it? So I head back into town and after a half hour or so I call the shop and the kid says " Well, I've got some bad news, I found a nail." And I'm thinking, no shit Sherlock, what are the odds?


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